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  • Writer's pictureBerlaymonster

“No autographs please, and bring your own mug” for La Ashton farewell

[*satire typing mittens off – this one’s for real, folks*]

Has the Lancashire lass from mining stock got ‘erself all airs and graces now she’s livin’ it up in that-there Brussels as ‘igh-rep? La-de-dah.

Flabbergasted staff in her EU ‘external action service’ are wondering if they’ve been suckered by some elaborate prank, after being invited to a farewell ‘coffee’ for the departing peer.

To start with the invite is in Comic Sans. Although that’s the least awful thing about the email.

The choice passage is highlighted in shouty red letters with a stern underlining (tho still in cuddly Comic Sans).

“The Cabinet has indicated that HRVP Ashton will come with her own coffee/tea mug and is expecting us to do the same”, the invite blurts helpfully.

“Please note that the HRVP does not usually sign autographs: kindly refrain also from taking selfies.”

The invite isn’t explicit as to whether a light touching of Her hem may be permissible, or if, as a goodbye treat, minions may leave their shoes on in Her presence.

BM (*hat-doff to the several people who brought this to BM’s attention/inbox*)

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