American EU Dude
New lobbying groups lobby for lobbyists and lobbying
EU lobbyists are so busy lobbying for their clients’ interests they forget to lobby for their own, according to a new study commissioned by Opacity International, a lobbying group formed to lobby for lobbyists.
“The results of this study prove what we’ve been saying all along: that studies are the best way to back up your policy positions,” said Opacity International’s spokesperson, who declined to be identified for reasons of transparency.
According to EU records obtained by Berlaymonster via a Freedom of Useless Information request, Opacity International is now an umbrella group for several other associations, NGOs and lobbying groups lobbying on behalf of lobbyists:
Revolving Doors Europe: Much more efficient than regular doors, revolving doors help keep energy and expertise in-house, while allowing the free flow of government officials from the public to the private sector.
The Umbrella Group: Not to be confused with the Opacity International umbrella group, the Umbrella Group actually lobbies on behalf of umbrellas. It is, however, part of a coalition of other protective raingear associations, including Wellington Watch, the EU Federation of Anoraks, and Rubbers Europe.
Campaigners Say: Need a quick story based on a new study about something being bad – or just a rent-a-quote from the nearest NGO? Call or email Campaigners Say for on-demand outrage or an auto-generated petition.
Clean Energy Coal-ition: Don’t be fooled by the name, this alliance has nothing to do with… you know…
European Letterbox Association: Based in Brussels but with official headquarters in Malta, this group represents lobbyists specializing in tax avoidance and employee non-compensation. It is also listed as the mailing address for all of the above associations.