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EU vows to crack down on ‘satire’

The European Commission wants to ban so-called “parody” accounts on Twitter and Facebook, claiming social media is no place for humour – attempted or otherwise – and insisting that the EU is definitely not hilarious.


“This is no joke,” said a Commission spokesperson. “There are a lot of fake accounts out there trying to find humour in European policy, and we are going to use every instrument we have to make sure they no longer get more laughs than the material we work hard to put out every day. We are taking aim at jocular proliferation.”


Sources said the growth in fake, satirical, parody accounts had made it impossible to take the EU seriously.


“From now on, all EU-related humour will be strictly regulated under the precautionary principle,” the spokesperson said. “If anybody makes humorous content it should have first been subject to proper stress-testing and future-proofing and then a full impact assessment. In order to find suitable candidates we will host a series of open-mic Midday Briefings.”


The new regulation will include strict rules of origin in which online comedy accounts can no longer be labelled as “satire” unless they have been approved; otherwise they can only be called “sparkling whine.”


The Commission said the new rules would take effect immediately and online webhosting of illegal snark providers would be susp--

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