EU to introduce lottery

Budget commissioner Dalia Grybauskaite is set to propose an EU lottery to plug the cash gap in Europe’s coffers. Know as “Dalia’s Honey Pot” it will guarantee a weekly jackpot of 14 million euros, as well as a night with the commissioner in a hotel of the winner’s choice. The jackpot, to be called “The Money Shot” according to drafts leaked to Berlaymonster, will also consist of all the euros left down the back of the high-backed chairs of senior ranking officials. “I love the idea of the Money Shot,” Commissioner Grybauskaite was overheard saying in the corridors of the Berlaymont.