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  • Writer's pictureBerlaymonster

EU approves €25.6bln of German money to Germany

EUHQ has agreed to hand Germany €25.6 billion in covid-crisis recovery funding from a massive EU borrowing scheme worth €800 billion, which Germany will largely be responsible for paying back.

"Thanks for my job and for letting us borrow lots of money, here's your slice" EUHQ boss Ursula Fondle Lion said today to actual EU boss Angela Merkel.

"And as these are grants, no need to pay them back to us."

"Now, about the 800 billion... we're already due for a first repayment.

"Can we also discuss my second term?" *mumbled swearing in German*

Yes. About 25.6 billion. Give or take.

Well. Take, actually."

"Danke. Tschü-üss"

Fondle Lion then headed to the airport, to take her message of a green and digital transformation of the economy to Italy, by plane, so she can hand over a printed folder at an in-person meeting with someone she's been conversing with by email and Zoom for months.

(Germany also largely paid for the printing costs and the flights).

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