EPSO release recruitment predictions

Following the publication of a series of open competitions for budding civil servants, a source at EPSO (the European Personnel Selection Orifice, responsible for the recruitment of all EU civil servants) predicts the following activity:

1. 24000 candidates will apply for the role of German, English, French, Italian or Portuguese conference interpreters. 25% of applicants will have Polish or Russian as their mother-tongue. 33% will claim that their mothers had always complimented them on their good French, despite having spoken it for only two weeks on a school exchange trip. The rest will be Italian. Estimated cost to the European taxpayer: 1350 man-hours and 160000 sheets of paper.

2. 65000 candidates will apply to be Lithuanian lawyer-linguists. 65 will be Lithuanian lawyer-linguists.

3. 6000 will apply for all other positions. Seven jobs will eventually become available and the posts will be filled by friends of the Commissioners’ wives.