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  • Writer's pictureAmerican EU Dude

Eggs call for tighter security after second attack by French President

LYON, France – France’s egg community lashed out at French President Emmanuel Macron, who stunned onlookers at a trade fair on Monday by using his head to attack an egg – the latest outburst in what is being called a “pattern of president-on-egg violence”.

Over the last several years Macron has used his head as a weapon against objects ranging from simple eggs to the unprotected hand of a far-right activist.

The latest attack occurred during a tour of French industrial successes, when Macron suddenly lunged forward and head-butted the unsuspecting hen fruit. While the initial blow from the President’s forehead failed to crack its shell, the egg fell to the floor and shattered in a yolky, albumen-y mess. Despite several attempts to revive it or even mop it up with a baguette, the egg was pronounced inedible.

Macron’s history of belligerence towards eggs dates to at least 2017, when he viciously smashed an œuf de poulet élevé en plein air with his face during the Paris agricultural fair. At that time Macron was a presidential candidate, and the attack was seen as an attempt to win support from French vegans.

A spokesman for the French Confédération des Tarte à la Crème expressed shock and concern about the latest incident, saying it was “only a matter of time before the President targets one of us.”

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