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Reykjavik to call on BP to block volcano

Iceland’s government is to call on British Petroleum to help block the Eyjafjallajökull volcano.

Following BP’s resounding success in stemming the oil leak in the Gulf of Mexico, Iceland is hoping the company will act to stem the flow of volcanic ash.

BP is already drawing up plans for a giant metal collander which it will drop over the spewing crater.

If that fails, the petrol giant aims to stuff the fissure with cricket balls, socks and celebrity autobiographies.

In a parallel effort, the European Free Trade Authority appears to be taking a different tack, threatening Iceland with legal action for ‘failure to implement the single European sky.’

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