By Albion Hardon of The Lactator
Before the dust has even settled on the German election, indeed before I’ve even bothered to check what the results are, one thing is clear — this is a convincing vindication of Brexit.
After 16 years with the intransigent Angela Merkel at the helm, the German people have delivered a very clear message: why couldn’t we have done what they did.
Sorry, Fritz, it’s too late now.
It was Frau Merkel who was blind to the attractions of following in UK’s hallowed footsteps, and she has paid the price.
It was Frau Merkel who was blithely deaf to pleas of the German carmarkers to keep their precious, nay sacred, access to the UK market. Now voters have shown exactly what they think of that by showing her the door.
Her people are now jealously eyeing the newfound freedoms they see across the Channel, fully aware that they could now be enjoying the same were it not for Merkel’s willfulness. Federalist fever-dreams like an EU army, so nightmarish they were only discreetly promised in national election manifestos, could now become all too real.
Well, it’s too late now. Merkel’s fall from grace means Germany is set to be governed by — of all things — a multi-party coalition. Serves them right too.
What Brit could allow themselves to be bound to a political system that delivers such consistently confusing forms of government, in which no one party has a majority? Not including Northern Ireland, Wales, Scotland, or London, of course, they don’t count.
And there is another result of the election that shows just how far we are from Germany, and how badly we fitted together in a binding political union. It’s hard to imagine our own dear electorate voting for a German. Yet that is exactly the troubling situation which Germany finds itself. Many things about the upcoming messy months of coalition negotiations are unclear, but tragically there seems doubt that the new Chancellor will be an overt, unabashed Hun.
What Briton would tolerate rule by a shameless Teuton? Leaving aside the Queen, she’s too posh. Is this what we fought the war, and several football matches, for?
Britain is now free from that nonsense, free to pursue its own destiny at a price which it’s now clear will amount to little more than widespread food and energy shortages. Thank God, Harry and St George for that.
[Eds: If you’re full in this week’s edn we can just publish at a later event? French elections, heavy rainfall, the opening of an envelope, whatever. Will lightly edit as needed, if needed. Invoice enc. A.H.]